THE MOTHERFUCKING PTERODACTYL SONG by The Oatmeal & Sarah Donner standard tuning, capo 2 He is the motherfucking pterodactyl Here to tear you a new asshole Yes it's true He ate ten thousand lightening bugs Kissing his bowels like a million hugs He shat them out one phosphorescent night Painting it like Christmas lights Yes it's true His plummage is the best in town All the hoes touch his sexy pteroid bone And he does put the T-Rex to shame Those pussy arms on that pussy frame Yes it's true he enjoys his hobbies too He smokes his pipe, rollerblades, and finds ladies to woo Oh, yes it's true he rode with the Triassic crew That includes Lystrosaurus and Plateosaurus too He is awkward on the floor His feet at shit and his balance quite poor He hooked up with a grizzly bear They made sweet love under the sea In outer space and everywhere Yes that bear gave birth to a motherfucking pterodactyl Who just might ptero you a new asshole So beware motherfuckers beware He is the motherfucking pterodactyl He is the motherfucking pterodactyl Remember him, remember his song, remember his tire iron And his enchanting thong He's the motherfucking pterodactyl